so many questions

So many questions I'd like to ask. And well some questions have been answered that I'd like to say I wasn't suprised they were asked or well so much as indirectly demanded. But it already happened, I'd rather it be somewhat forgotten and not brought up until years and years from now but I highly doubt that possibility. From the person that has indirectly told me, it bothers me that it affects the welfare of us both. It isn't that its harmful but simultaneously it is within an instant. How can someone be blinded and not realize their words of exchange or their behaviors? Well it's complex and it's simple. I've contributed to what was said and what was asked and didn't exactly respond as straightfoward as expected. I was fascinated to say the least and confused at it being so casual and blunt. It's as if we were thinking the same but not saying the same but still having the meaning behind it parallel. Why of all questions would it be that? Why bring such a topic up that you know can change so many circumstances and well why choose me? So many things as I've responded are missing. To ask what's missing just makes me rethink everything but then take it back so I don't over-analyze. What is it that you really want from me and if I'm completely wrong, than fine. I'd rather you prove me wrong than right...at the moment, I'd rather say I was wrong and should have known it was a hypothetical question...why is it easier to tell a lie than tell the truth?
the truth hurts, but I'd rather know the truth,be hurt,than be happy living a lie. I know for sure you won't be reading this,but there's no other way that I can ever bring this up to you or to anyone personally as a actual conversation for it would be a little overwhelming to repeat. well to a certain extent, for i've talked to people that aren't informed or mature enough to know.Being the naive person I am, it all seems like a joke. But in reality, it confuses me less, to some extent you're actually serious so serious about what's going on, and I have no clue how to react in the same serious manner. You don't get it at all. Or maybe I have no sense of direction. If you know what's going on and don't bother to tell me or bring it up, than don't expect anything less from me. In a way, I'm flattered,in a way I'm disturbed, I'm also confused, happy, and extra worried. All I want is to care and show I care about you and your well-being as well as my own. that we are both respected. But right now, this is a little too much for me. Lines have definitely been crossed in all sorts of directions and as I've said before, why choose me?
at least if you'd answer that question truthfully, maybe just maybe. It'd definitely be different with everything that's been happening and everything that is being planned.