they disapprove

Somehow I know that all in all they are just looking out for me.They want the best for me&&know me more than I probably think I know myself.With the way I am with the way my perspectives differ from those of others.I guess I'm waiting to grow up in a sense but at the same time,I like being my age&&rather thankful for all the experiences that occur in my life.Regardless of whether they are good experiences or not.Lately, I've been thinking that my mind has been too caught up in the summer that hasn't even arrived yet.Although the last few days have been reminding me of the summer daze that I had around this time last year when my cousins from Austrailia were here&&with all the debut practices. Sigh, how I miss both my cousins&&those practices.Needless to say, that I was distracted just the same as I am yet again within the same range of people&&since this yearr even more.More filipinos coming here to the States within the family friends of my parents&&within their Music Ministry here in Elmhurst at St. Barts.It's a change for me, but in a really good way.More filipinos that are around my age&&that are my age here within the limits of my reach of a ten minute train ride or five minute drive =).
I mean it's kinda funny because I've always prayed to have teens my age within my reach of the neighborhood as well as the ones I love within PNYM<33.Yet, another family I am BLESSED to call MY OWN!
Unfortunately, I am not as fluent in tagalog as I'd like to be&&here they are wanting to be fluent in english.It works out I guess because we're all learning. As weird as I am, someway I understand kapangpangan.Ask me how I understand, I wouldn't know but somehow I understand it as much as I understand tagalog (which is plenty).Still, I don't speak tagalog based on my self-esteem of sounding wrong&&well I am gramatically incorrect.I do have plenty of help so it's cool.Oh yeah and when I do say little phrases in tagalog, they always say aww so cute! and then they mimick what I say =]
All in all,my summer&&my recent months have been filled with being with new friends&&family(who I can call my own too)&&every other week just as before with my PNYMFAMBAM<3.I'm practicing my guitar chords again&it's pretty hard&&frustrating since I'm teaching myself so much as to being nimble&&relaxed with my fingers switching in between chords.But I think at least I hope by the end of the summer I'll be able to play well.
I'd like to say I don't regret a majority of my junior year...but what I do wish I hadn't done would be slack off ever so often which is now catching up to me.The year is ending the 10th&&I can't change that. The only things I can do is suck it up&pray I have the strength to do exceptionally well on my finals®ents.That in itself is a challenge. Let alone taking the exams themselves&&ohh I can't forget! A five hour test named the SATs which is in another week!
BOY oh BOY! I really have to gear up&&have some strength stored to accomplish all of theese sleepless nights of 'studying'&&hopefully I will really study! minus the quotation marks of not studying but either blogging talkin to ppl&&or being on the phone!!!


PRAYERS PLEASE&&I WILL PRAY FOR ALL THOSE WHO ARE TAKING SUMMER CLASSES
I ALSO PRAY THAT I DONT GO TO SUMMER SCHOOL FOR PRECAL OR US HISTORY&GOVERNMENT(USHG IDK WHAT I'D DO IF I GO TO SUMMER SCHOOL FOR SOMETHING STUPID LIKE THT)


WISH ME GOODLUCK&&I HAVE MY MISS FILIPINIANA DAY COMING PRETTY SOON IN THE MIDDLE OF IT ALL!

_ROXANNEMARIE_